Friday, December 16, 2005

extraordinary machine by fiona apple

i certainly haven't been shopping for any new shoes
and i certainly haven't been spreading myself around
i still only travel by foot and by foot it's a slow climb
but i'm good at being uncomfortable so i can't stop changing all the time

i noticed that my opponent is always on the go
and won't go slow so as not to focus and i notice
he'll hitch a ride with any guide as long as they go fast from whence he came
but he's no good at being uncomfortable so he can't stop staying exactly the same

if there was a better way to go then it would find me
i can't help it the road just rolls out behind me
be kind to me or treat me mean
i'll make the most of it i'm an extraordinary machine

i seem to you to seek a new disaster every day
you deem me due to clean my view and be at peace and lay
i mean to prove i mean to move in my own way
and say i've been getting along for long before you came into the play

i am the baby of the family
it happens so everybody cares
and wears the sheeps clothes while they chaperone
curious you're looking down your nose at me while you appease
courteous to try and help but let me set your mind at ease

if there was a better way to go then it would find me
i can't help it the road just rolls out behind me
be kind to me or treat me mean
i'll make the most of it i'm an extraordinary machine

do i so worry you
you need to hurry to my side, it's very kind
but it's to no avail
i don't want the bail
i promise you everything will be just fine

if there was a better way to go then it would find me
i can't help it the road just rolls out behind me
be kind to me or treat me mean
i'll make the most of it i'm an extraordinary machine.

Saturday, December 10, 2005

the sweet spot(s)

i just finished watching the movie house of d and i want to recommend it to anyone looking for a small, sweet movie with a lot of heart. it does not shake the world, but it's a genuine movie and a worthwhile way to spend a couple of hours. i will, however, put up this disclaimer: it is written and directed by david duchovny, and if you have read my blog before you will know that i have a soft spot for the man and it could be clouding my objectivity (p.s. go to that link, and no i didn't write that). so, take the recommendation for what you think it's worth, but i'd like to believe i would feel exactly the same about the movie, whoever was involved.

anyway, this movie did not have a voice when released in limited theatres, and like many small movies with little advertising backing from its studio, it got lost. so, watch it. if you enjoy it like i did, pass it on. word-of-mouth has power. (or, if you hate it, come back and yell at me. at least i'll know for sure that someone is reading this. you lurkers out there must have something to say.) also, if you're interested, david has his own director's blog on the lion's gate film website.

while i'm at it, here are a few other recommendations i have to pass on:

music: raul midon, joe purdy, motion city soundtrack

book: the turn of the screw by henry james.

perfume: soul by curve

yea, that's about it. good night. =)

"A man is only a man when he can be himself wherever he is."
-House of D

Thursday, December 08, 2005

paracelsus or a three-toed sloth?

At times I almost dream
I too have spent a life the sages' way,
And tread once more familiar paths. Perchance
I perished in an arrogant self-reliance
Ages ago; and in that act a prayer
For one more chance went up so earnest, so
Instinct with better light let in by death,
That life was blotted out -- not so completely
But scattered wrecks enough of it remain,
Dim memories, as now, when once more seems
The goal in sight again.

-"Paracelsus," Robert Browning

during my freshman year of high school my english teacher was really into poetry and for one of our first assignments he made us read elizabeth barrett browning's "sonnets from the portuguese." while it seemed a daunting reading task for a 14-year-old who had yet to experience many of the emotions being expressed within the passages, i quickly took to the sonnets as well as the rest of the collection of poems within browning's book. the book i had bought i found at a used bookstore, and it also included other poems of both elizabeth and her husband robert browning. since then, i have had an affinity for this collection with its old binding and yellowed pages, and even after we had finished studying the sonnets in class i continued to read from the book every night before bed, trying to decipher the meanings of the poems (yes, i really am that big of a dork.).

one of robert's poems that i took a liking to is called "paracelsus" (1835) and is a long dramatic poem that i mostly did not understand at the time and still probably do not grasp entirely. it is written by browning to be a narrative from the famous 16th century chemist paracelsus, and focuses more on the mysticism surrounding his study of the natural world and his search for "sacred knowledge" than on strict facts of science. in paracelsus' day, science and alchemy were its own forms of magic that most people only understood as mystical practices anyway. the passage from "paracelsus" that i have quoted at the beginning of this entry deals with the idea of reincarnation or rebirth, and was the catalyst for my thoughts today.

back during the same time freshman year, an episode of the x-files aired called "the field where i died." (i know you're "surprised" that this has come around to me talking about my favorite show of all time, but try to stick with me here anyway.) this episode deals with the idea of past lives and reincarnation as a possible explanation for dissociative identity disorder (multiple personalities) and the strong bonds people can feel with others whom they've barely just met: "souls come back together; different but always together, again and again to learn...evil returns as evil, but love, souls mate eternal" (mulder). while i knew that this was the hollywood romanticized version of some aspects of eastern religious beliefs, i couldn't help but be taken by it. something about the whole idea really captured my attention and made me think about rebirth and being able to hold on to things you had learned in another time, so as to hopefully not repeat the same mistakes.

in both the beginning and the end of the episode, there is a voiceover of mulder reciting what sounds like part of a poem. immediately following the episode, there was rumor that it had actually been written by david duchovny himself (not entirely a stretch for someone with a degree from princeton in english literature). however, to me it seemed familiar, and as i have never been one to just let something like that be, i did a search for the passage on the internet. i discovered that the poem was not only not written by duchovny, but that it was, in fact, the aforementioned passage from browning's "paracelsus" that i had so recently been reading.

well, since i was obsessed with all things x-files related, you can imagine that i was more than a little excited with this coincidence, and it fueled my interest in the episode's ideas even more. i think i can even remember writing something about it down in my diary, which is a pretty big deal since i wrote in there probably once a year, at most.

of course, high school happens, and with my busy schedule i didn't exactly stick with the pursuit of these ideas, nor would i have ever brought it up in conversation with my family or friends (i was enough of a dork already, philosophizing about reincarnation at the lunch table probably wouldn't have helped). however, i still continued to read the poetry of both brownings, and the book was even among one of the only ones i packed with me to bring to college my freshman year and every year after. even today, in the closet-sized bedroom of my apartment that can only fit the smallest bookshelf imaginable, in between the new media monopoly and mcluhan sits the old, navy-blue, clothbound book of "best known poems."

it has been a while since i thumbed through the book, but i never really forgot browning or the idea of reincarnation that sparked my interest; i just never actively researched the true nature of those beliefs. that is, until about two months ago when i began to study the ideas of buddhism in order to find another way to be spiritual besides the, so far, personally unfulfilling christianity of my upbringing. although, surprising, even once I started my research and came upon the buddhist beliefs about rebirth, i failed to remember and connect the ideas to my prior experience with both browning's poem and the x-files episode (yes, i forgot an x-files episode. i know, it's craziness.).

so today I came home from basically my last college course ever (!!!), sat down to watch tv and happened upon a rerun of that same thought-provoking episode. like before, i was fascinated with the ideas presented and recognized its, once again, timely appearance into my life. i know that to most of you it seems like i am reading far too much into these coincidences and that i am seeing what i want to see. but i have come to realize, maybe through my own life experiences and a little through my recent studies on buddhism, that more things in our life are connected than we realize and give credit to. if priests and nuns can get "callings" to study the word of god, can i not also see signs to point me towards the study of my own spiritual path?

maybe not. i don't know. maybe it doesn't have as much to do with the signs actually being there as me thinking that they might be. and maybe rebirth is a bunch of crap, but i don't see how faith in it is that much different than believing there is a beautiful place beyond life on earth. i also do not believe that i will possibly come back as a three-toed sloth in my next life (an idea buddhism does not teach either). i think that i just like something about the idea that parts of the energy and significant experiences that make us ourselves are not lost when we die, but come back to keep improving and learning until we are able to reach a state of perfect knowledge. in the end, to me, the implications of such a belief are the same as what i would consider to be the best message of christianity - lead a noble, balanced, moral life and you will be rewarded.

confucius say: amen.

At times I almost dream
I too have spent a life the sages' way,
And tread once more familiar paths. Perchance
I perished in an arrogant self-reliance
Ages ago; and in that act a prayer
For one more chance went up so earnest, so
Instinct with better light let in by death,
That life was blotted out -- not so completely
But scattered wrecks enough of it remain,
Dim memories, as now, when once more seems
The goal in sight again.

Tuesday, December 06, 2005

you know what really grinds my gears?

stupid ho dolls.

yup, that's right. stupid-slutty-ass-ho dolls. and i'm not talking blow-up dolls here. no i'm talking about dolls marketed to little kids who would love nothing more than to also don an ass skirt and thigh-highs once they reach high school and most likely before. and then society pauses to wonder why kids are growing up so quickly these days. well, gee, i think we might need a dateline investigation into this one. or maybe stone phillips could just drag himself to toys r us and pick up some bratz.

have you seen these dolls? i've seen them before, on commercials, in the store, maybe even at houses i've babysat at, but i've never really stopped to look at them. that is, not until i had to devise an advertising plan to gain back the fashion doll market share for poor, wholesome, neglected barbie. those damn bratz are stepping on her toes (or at least they would be if her molded plastic feet weren't perpetually the shape of a stilleto). apparently around age 7 kids are abandoning barbie and turning to the much hipper, street-styled, "hooker-chic" bratz. and when they're called hooker-chic that's really not an over-statement.

during my research for the plan, i read articles about this barbie-bratz war that has plastic panties at Mattel all in a bunch. i also visited the web sites of both dolls to see 1) what i'm having to advertise and 2) what the competition is all about. that is when i really got a good look at these bratz in all their forms - rock star, snow boarder, soccer player, etc. and what i learned was that in any form they may take, the essense of bratz is that they are stupid little hos!! they are obviously crafted to look like teenagers but are wearing outfits that if i saw them on my college campus, on a saturday night, on halloween i would think: "who's a ho?!"

oh, and the kicker to my visit to the bratz site is the off-shoot of the normal bratz that they now sell called baby bratz. these are dolls still in diapers wearing belly shirts and leather!! ahhhhh!! i guess that's what happens when mom bratz is 13-years-old. i wonder where baby-daddy bratz is at? i heard he's been going around with skipper. there always was something a little slutty about that girl, even if she is barbie's sister.

lord save us all.

Wednesday, November 30, 2005

who let me major in criminal justice anyway?

it feels like i wrote this a lifetime ago, but it was really only back in March of 2004 during Criminal Justice Seminar. i had stream of consciousness on the brain.

sun through the window shines in squares on the floor through my mind into nothing but a feeling a longing a person a thought of a million pieces of slivered glass melted together in a mosaic of colors like a rainbow in the sky smiling over the ocean water caressing my body beneath the facade constructed with waves lapping the shore searching for freedom in the grains of sand between my toes healing the soul as they scratch like drugs in my veins elevating me above the darkness found between the squares of light in my life.

Tuesday, November 29, 2005

great zeus' beard! this is a long one!

today i was watching something that i taped off of TV a few years back. you know, that time long, long ago before TiVo? i was working on the computer at the same time (hooray for multitasking!) so i wasn't fast-forwarding through the commercials. i looked up during a commercial break, and, forgetting for a minute that i had a tape in, i became confused at why i was watching a promo for "The Mummy Returns". that's when i started paying less attention to my work and more attention to the commercials.

maybe it's because i am an advertising major, but looking back on old commercials is almost like opening up a time capsule of trends, fads, TV shows, movies, businesses and news flashes long forgotten. during this specific video my favorites were promos for "Dark Angel" (oh, jon.), that car commercial with the hipster people in the car grooving along to "start the commotion" and a promo for the 11pm news that said "he's been in office for 100 days, hear what some local politicians have to say about the presidency of george w. bush." i would give anything to see that report.

so what this has all brought me to is the contemplation of what devices like TiVo, DVR and DVD mean not only to the future of advertising, a hot topic of the moment, but also for the history of advertising and of popular culture. what happens when we are no longer witnesses to the past? maybe it doesn't mean all that much since most people who have taped anything off of TV usually fast forward through the commercials anyway, but i can't help feeling that something is being lost in computer chips and lasers. i guess i am just mourning the loss of the unexpected gems that can be found when doing things the "old fashioned" way. the constant investigator in me loves to touch for myself and uncover and discover things i had forgotten about.

sometimes even just a commercial or a newsbreak from long ago can hold new meaning in the present. have you ever watched a movie you haven't seen in years and realized that character you had only envisioned in your head as an unknown actor is now someone who has become famous? for me it is a strange but great feeling like a light bulb being flicked on or a piece of a puzzle fitting itself into its correct position in my brain. the actor in that movie now has a face and an identity instead of just identifying features, and that can make the old movie something entirely new to be re-experienced. for me, it is a great phenomena, and watching some of those old commercials feels the same way to me.

i can even still remember very vividly a commercial that was taped onto a video by my parents when they recorded mary poppins for me. i must have watched that movie hundreds of times as a kid, mostly without skipping the commercial breaks. to this day i can see a little blonde girl sitting in a pretty white dress singing about oscar meyer weiners and how her mom doesn't let her eat them without a bib since they are so juicy and she can't ruin her dress. you know who it turns out that little girl was? the girl who eventually played stephanie tanner, pre-Full House. if my parents had just bought me a recording of that movie i wouldn't have that memory of how i liked that commercial and i would have never made the discovery later in life of who that girl was. i guess that really sounds like a trite thing to feel people will miss out on when watching everything on DVD, but it makes me wonder that maybe it's these little moments in our lives we lose that start to add up under our noses and leave us feeling less than thrilled with our human experience; that we don't stop long enough to discover and appreciate the "ah-has!" of life anymore.

i know this random reflection on something as insignificant as the loss of an obviously inferior form of TV recording seems out of character me. after all, i am the same person who, on most days, would curl into the fetal position on the bus floor if someone were to take away my iPod and the person who often refers to my powerbook as "my baby." i also don't really know where all this is heading or what conclusions i'm trying to make here. maybe i'm just trying to justify my desire to hold on to the shows and movies i have taped off the tv.

the other weird thing i find myself doing (which may be slightly related to the rest of this random tangent i am currently boring you with), is when a movie or something comes on tv that i own on dvd or vhs i still want to watch it on tv. i can own it and not watch it forever, but the minute it's on tv i'll get excited and find myself watching it. could i avoid the hassle of commercials by putting in the actual movie? yes. do i do it? no. does that make me weird? probably. is this news to any of you? probably not. =P

so if you're still reading this post , congratulations to you. i'd give you a prize for making it to the end, but i don't know who you are. so instead, you win my appreciation! awww. don't you feel good now? oh wait, here' are fun quotes from an episode of will and grace i saw the other day, you win that.

Jack (singing to karen): Karen and Milo sittin' in a tree K-I-S-I-N-G.....wait?

Jack (on a soccer field dancing around, not paying attention): Here I am. I'm the mean machine. I'm fast and lean. I'm....what rhymes with lean? Penis? Hahahahaha. I just said penis.

Thursday, November 24, 2005

my recipe for a successful holiday with the family:

1 glass of Chardonnay

1 glass of Cabernet Sauvignon

1 coffee with Disaronno

1 Belloton on the rocks

2 madras*

add to previous mixture of patience, thick-skin, "amused" laugh and deep breathing, stir and enjoy. always a party favorite. try it at your next family affair.

*any of these ingedients may be substituted with almost anything from the liquor store and enjoyed at any serving size, or straight from the bottle.

Wednesday, November 23, 2005

evil-allison: more sarcastic than the original........ you've been warned.

i have decided that i'm not going to check away messages when i'm bored anymore because those are minutes of my life that i can never get back. also, if i have to read one more lovey-dovey piece of crap written to someone's significant other i'm going to yak (or yack? whichever one doesn't mean a hairy llama-looking animal). and i know that's just the reaction i have because i am bitter about not having someone in my life to write about (HELLO i don't have a degree in psychology for nothing). but you know what? right now making fun of mushy couples makes me feel better about myself and i'm not afraid to admit it. so happy holidays and super early valentines day you fuckers. go find a bear-skin rug and sing "let it snow" or something. i give you all premission to make fun of me when i become a heart-melting mess, but until then, shut it.

p.s. those of you getting married, disregard this message. i don't hold anything against you or your happiness and, ironically (crap, i can't spell), you are the ones without the insessant IM declarations.

p.s.s. i really love all of u. soooo much. you are my <3s 4-eva.

haha. sorry, couldn't resist.

*this message brought to you by evil-allison: when good allison just won't do.

"What's waiting for us? Loneliness! And then 365 more shopping days til even MORE loneliness!" -Mulder, The X-Files, "The Ghosts Who Stole Christmas"

Sunday, November 20, 2005

something funny i just remembered

this is a conversation that took place in the car last weekend when my parents and nicole came to visit:

dad: i was channel surfing the other day and on VH1 there was this new Black Eyed Peas Song, My Humpy Humps or something.
me: Yea dad, My Humps
dad: What's with that song?! I know those Black Eyed Peas are good, but they're kinda out there huh?

ha. i love getting my dad's opinion on random pop culture stuff.

Thursday, November 17, 2005

i'm a fucking genius

i am going to go work at VH1 because i have then best show idea ever. wait for it....

"i love i love the 80s"!!!

it won't come out until it's once again cool to admit you liked "i love the 80s" and it'll be made in the same format as i love the 80s, 90s, 70s and holidays editions. however, it will be your NEW favorite half-celebrities waxing nostaligic about all those old half-celebrities making fun of that crazy decade, the 80s! just imagine the commentary made about michael ian black talking about "the goonies" and doing the truffle shuffle! or remember the time when brian boitano was talking about "pee wee's big adventure" and then he did the "tequila" dance? that was awesome.

see what i mean? it just never gets old.

you KNOW that the only thing better than reminiscing about crazy 80s hair is remembering how funny it was to watch OTHER people make fun of crazy 80s hair! haha, aquanet. wasn't it just the best when daisy fuentes told everyone about how she used to mooch hair spray off of girls in the bathroom to get her hair 80s-tastic!

by then big-ass hair will even be back in and then they can make fun of how stupid all those commentators were for dissing those hair styles when CLEARLY their long, straight hair and sidebangs were really the worst. who let them on TV that way?!

and where were you when you first saw "i love the 80s"? dakota fanning remebers that she was in her trailer on the set of "i am sam" and couldn't stop laughing at all the crazy things that she wasn't even alive for! hahahaha. but she loved "i love the 80s" anyway.

"i love i love the 80s"! isn't it fun to remember the remembering!?

oh, i am so getting rich from this idea.
just you wait.

what's happenin' hot stuff

listening to: my latest CD mix, including Death Cab, Joe Purdy, Jason Mraz and Gary Jules.

reading: The Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle

watching: LOST, Family Guy and The X-Files: Season 7

eating: sunflower seeds.

drinking: gin and tonics (not an everyday thing, just my drink of choice right now)

searching for: a boy (what else is new?), something to believe in.

happy about: the warm weather, my volunteer work, learning to clear my head.

not so happy about: senioritis, theory paper, being broke, problems with my camera, back pain.

excited for: Harry Potter 4, Christmas decorations/music, Cancun, weddings.

missing: summer, CLR, dancing, malibu.

what's next: Boston Youth Moves, more job searching, the comps, a graduate degree, the future = wide open.

Tuesday, November 15, 2005

it's my birthday yay!

absolutely the best birthday weekend ever:

free food at work, beckysue, alicia, GUSTER, jesus on the radio unplugged, breakfast with steph, showing beckysue boston, the sad jack 'o lantern, pottery barn story time and sing along, light saber fight, cheesecake factory, birthday gin, the peter griffin bump, erin's dance grooves, jake ivorys, brick house dance, crazy COM kids, double fisting G&Ts, can't touch me, mac and cheese, masachusetts: you're more likely to live here (x3), the airport, my parents and nicole, legal seafood, "remember when you used to be afraid of parades?", "i'm a fucking genius", napoleon dynamite flip book and new family guy.

love to everyone who made this weekend a blast. i couldn't have asked for more fun and more friends to share my birthday with. thanks also to those who called to wish me a happy day, i wish you could have been here celebrating. next time! =)

finally...halloween pics!

ok, so the three of us dressed up as the girl versions of our three guy friends who threw the party. i definitely lucked out with the best one.

one of my favorite costumes - "show 'em my motto!"

i do an ice luge

kelly and erin take a turn

double your kilt-wearing, nose-ring having, goth make-up fun!

Monday, November 07, 2005

all these places feel like home

i know i said i was going to post pictures of the halloween party and i am, just not right now. sorry.

instead i'm going to talk about my trip to elmira (my alma mater) this past weekend. i went to visit one of my best friends, caryn (i don't know if you read this, but hi anyway), who is in her senior year. plus all the other crazy-ass-dancer-hos that i love and miss. it wasn't a super exciting visit as far as events go, but it was a great weekend with movies, dancing, chilling and even a lunch date with sara. =) excitement is over-rated anyway. i've found that some of the best days are those in which nothing important happens. they give you time to actually stop and realize how lucky you are.

something else i realized while at e.c. this time was that it isn't weird going back there anymore. all the previous times i've visited have resulted in many surreal moments that happen when i'm walking old paths toward my former apartment or the dance studio and i get the feeling as if i haven't left yet, that i still live there. it is a brief second of hallucinatory time travel in a brain that after four years is accustomed to seeing everything as a student, not a visitor. and in all the times i visited before this, i wished these were not just brief moments, but that i were back there. i wanted all my friends still in one place, i wanted the certainty of myself in the world of purple and gold, and most of all, i wanted the comfort of a place that feels like home.

it's not that i don't want some of those things still. (believe me, if i could build a complex that would house all of my favorite people from elmira college and beyond in one place, i would.) but this visit, while it made me miss the people i love and remember the times we had, didn't make me want to be back. instead, there was a peace in being there that i haven't felt before. i was comfortable with being a visitor, and when i left i didn't feel like i was leaving part of my heart behind (as it did so many other times since graduation day). i now realize that things won't ever be the same as they were while i was there, but that i can still enjoy just being where i was always so comfortable, so me. and although it may not be the place i live anymore, it will always be home.

be. it. ever. so.


Thursday, October 27, 2005

insight into my roommates and i:

Me: Hey Kelly, can you dye my hair tomorrow?
Kelly: I won't be home until after 8
Me: Ok, can you dye my hair on Saturday?
Kelly: Not until after 5:30
Me: Ok, would never work for you?
Kelly: How about next never?

A little later:
Erin: Hey Kelly, do you know this random guy from my high school that I haven't seen since like 1998?
Kelly: Yea, I went to the prom with him.
Me: Of course you did.

Even later:
Erin: Can we all wear booby tassles on Halloween!
Kelly: I don't think I'll have time to go to Walmart.

And lastly:
All together (singing): Shantilly lace and a pretty face, pony tail hanging down, a wiggle when you walk, a giggle when you talk, makes the world go 'round 'round round'!!!!

I love our special times.

Saturday, October 22, 2005

pass that what?

after teaching dance all day today and listening to a lot of missy elliot, i'm sitting in the living room with erin watching tv when i randomly yell "who-de whooo!" (a la "Pass That Dutch"). then we get into a conversation about what the hell that even means. i always kind of assumed it had to do with marijuana because of the whole passing thing, but i really wasn't sure. we decided that the only dutch we knew of was going dutch on a date and the people who like to clog. then we thought maybe it means the people since there was clogging in the video for the song right? but what would missy want with a dutch person?

for the answer i turned to the omnipotent master of the universe and my own best friend, google. of course, as much as i love google, it isn't perfect, and before finding the answer i had to weed out all the sites about THE Dutch. finally i found a site that confirmed my initial thought that the phrase is talking about pot. apparently it's refering (or REEfering, HAHA......sorry.) to a specific type of dooby rolled with some kind of dutch cigar paper? yea, i still don't know, but at least when someone asks me to pass that dutch someday i won't hand over a guy with wooden shoes.

"There'll be plenty of time for smokin doobies when you're living in a VAN down by the RIVER!" -Chris Farley, SNL

Friday, October 21, 2005

here's an equation for you

(ricky martin - la vida loca) + fat joe = a shitty song

Thursday, October 20, 2005

random musings on the day

i heard a car accident happen today while i was on the bus coming back from class. i couldn't see it because it happened behind us and unlike school buses, there isn't a back window. all i know is that there was a screech of tires and a loud bang. it didn't sound like a bad accident but for some reason it gave me a chill and a feeling of unease. it's gone now, just took me by surprise at the time.

the new slew of supernatural/alien-related tv shows have NOTHING on the x-files. watch it in syndication. still the creepiest, most imaginative and intriguing series. plus, sometimes you get to see mulder in boxer-briefs. yummy.

gummi candy corn is the worst idea ever and paying 3.50 for a super small bag of it is really stupid.

unconsciously comparing your body type to that of every other girl in the room is probably an unhealthy habit. but still one that's hard to break.

reading "Helter Skelter" (book about the Manson murders and trial) is not that scary, until you realize your iPod has started playing "Don't Drink the Water". the creep factor tends to go up when your imagination gets a soundtrack.

i like my hair. i know, more random than the rest of the randomness, but i was just in the bathroom washing my hands and i had to share the thought i had. otherwise most of this post was going to be kind of a downer.

oh, well. just keep the david duchovny visual in your head and you'll feel better. i know i do.

Wednesday, October 19, 2005

why i love october (and halloween)

- sweaters but no coats
- sunshine and sweatshirts together
- crunching leaves on the sidewalk
- pumpkins
- apples
- movies on tv every night with titles like Damnation Alley, Poltergiest 8, The Legend of Hell House and Some Dead People are Taking Over My Town XV
- Columbus Day (day off)
- Disney airs 'Hocus Pocus" like it's their job
- Oktoberfest
- fishnet stalkings become mainstream for like a week
- lots of evil laughing
- corn that tastes like candy!
- Thriller and Monster Mash on the radio
and the best part - dressing up like a dorky/slutty/nasty/funny/sexy/icky whatever it is and walking around in public.

this year, i'm going to try to find the best cosumes to take pictures of during halloween and i'll post them here. although i think my roommates and i might win, at least for best initial reaction. mwuahahahahaha. MWUAHAHAHAHAHAHA. MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!

Drugs are bad....mmmmkay?

wow, i just read my last post. i think i was on crack. if you haven't read it yet, here's fair warning that it's slightly manic. i'm just high on life, i swear.

tonight i went a huntin' for a good blog to read and write about every day for my contemporary mass comm. class. we have to keep a journal on one blog for a week and write about how it's written, the content, the author etc. it's a pretty good assignment i think. anywho, i searched forever to find the perfect blog, aka one that would be interesting, updated frequently and pretty. the one i decided on is called Dooce and is actually ranked #7 on some big site's top 100 blogs. the site is linked to over 10,000 other blogs! and the craziest part is that it is just a woman's journal. it is not centered around a cause, political stance, specific interest, it is just her day-to-day thoughts and life. and people eat it up. to her credit, she is a very talented designer-turned stay at home mom (a very noble choice), extremely well-written, sarcastic (my favorite), witty, interesting and truthful. but it just floors me that so many people would find her site and become caught up in her life. it is like watching a reality show, without the whole scripted manipulation part. which means it may actually be good.

two thumbs up for well-written blogs
two thumbs down for drugs

and a whole lotta love to puppies. just because.

Sunday, October 16, 2005


the rain finally broke today! and just in time for the Making Strides Against Breast Cancer walk. the wind was pretty crazy and kelly and i almost ended up in the Charles on several occassions, but the sun was out and it finally felt like new england fall. of course, now i'll have to disassemble my Ark2000 and sell all those damn animals back to the black market. i'm keeping the koalas though.

anywho, the walk was great, and we took a little detour to starbucks where i got a caramel apple cider. mmm, yummy. i was in fall heaven. the walk went by pretty quick because kelly and i talked the whole way and quoted family guy, of course. Chris: "i'm so hungry i could ride a horse.......i don't get it. i could ride him to the store i guess." sweet. then we watched her kids dance at the Hatch Shell before heading home.

that's when we found out there was some "Brighton Day Parade" today and our bus wasn't running because the whole main street in and out of the town was blocked. awesome. why we 3 good citizens of brighton don't know a crap about what's going on in our town is pretty funny. fortunately the last stop on the B line of the T is a mile from our apartment, so after all the walking this morning we figured we could handle another mile (that and the other alternative was a 4 mile walk from kenmore to our house). while on the T i kept myself occupied in the most mature fashion possible - imagining how funny it would be to screw with the recorded voice that announces the stops and says "the destination of this train is Boston College." i don't know if you know the sound of the T voice, but just imagine it saying "the destination of this train is your mom's house." you know it would be badass funny. or maybe i have problems. anyway, i was amused and kelly laughed. (of course that could have a been directly correlated to her only getting 2 hours of sleep last night, waking up at 7:45 am to try not to get blown over the side of the Harvard Bridge and then drinking a venti latte.) yea, maybe i'm really not funny.

want to know what is funny? since the walk today i have had a part of the new Family Guy movie in my head and it won't get out. i even came home and watched the part hoping it would leave once i heard it again. no such luck. it is one of the funniest parts in the movie and my roommates and i replayed it twice while watching the movie, but it's not going to be funny much longer if it takes up permenant residence in my brain. if you like family guy and haven't checked out the new movie "Stewie Griffin: The Untold Story" you should. and look for the part where Peter randomly (what about the show isn't random?) comes out hanging from the clothes line in the backyard dressed in a Spider-man costume with a big flabby belly roll bulging out. as he pulls himself along on the line he sings (to the tune of the Batman theme, by the way): "Danananananananana-SPIDER-MAN! Here comes peter on the clothesline but his name's not peter it is SPIDER-MAN, SPIDER-MAN! Come on lois let's get busy right here in the backyard cause i'm SPIDER-MAN, SPIDER-MAN! Touch my booty with your hand, SPIDER-MAN." Oooooo, we're in luck! I just found a clip of the song online here.

and i'm now realizing that nothing about this post is probably ammusing or funny to anyone but me (and maybe my roommates who won't read this anyway). it also may be proof that sometimes i might take drugs without conscious knowledge. i don't have another explanation for the sometimes bizarro shiznit that comes from my brain and spills out of my mouth on days like today.

other exciting events of this weekend included: dinner with Steph at Whiskeys on friday which was really good, going to Sanctuary with Nikki, Dylcia and Emily and drinking beer, sangria and gin and tonics all in the same night - fun at the time, but not recommended, hanging out with kelly's friends who came to visit for the weekend and going to my first Stand Up For Kids training session. i'm really excited to learn about Stand Up and start doing outreach this year. it seems like it's going to be tough but worth it and i know that erin will help me out because she has been involved for a couple years already. if you're in a bigger city and want to get involved in a great cause that helps homeless kids you should check it out. and on that, more serious and mature note i say adieu.

interesting fact: while playing 2 truths and a lie at training this weekend nobody got mine right. my 3 statements were 1 - my favorite movie is the matrix, 2 - my father is a lawyer and 3 - i have driven cross country twice. do you know the lie?

Tuesday, October 11, 2005

nothing important happened today...

except that we got today and thursday off from communication theory class! heck yes! so therefore, it is the best week ever. plus i taught dance and made some sweet mula with uncle rico (ok, he wasn't there) and my staffing agency might have a job that i can go to every wednesday. more mula. fabulous. now i may be able to pay next month's rent, oh, and the parking ticket i got this morning (oops).

other than that, i have nothing of great interest to talk about.

it's been raining here since friday night and probably will be until next tuesday. that's pretty exciting. um, nope.

i could talk about how i saw jason mraz in concert on sunday night and it was awesome. kelly and i had great seats and the opening bands were even fabulous. i had heard of carbon leaf before and knew their songs "what about everything?" and "life less ordinary." they did some amazing four part harmony a capella and the lead singer played the penny-whistle or some flute-like instrument that reminded me of ireland. it was cool.

then the second opener was this guy named raul midon. he had an acoustic guitar, a microphone and an astounding voice. in his songs he made it sound like there was a drum accompanyment by hitting parts of the guitar and he used his mouth to sound just like a trumpet. really, check this guy out. download his stuff from iTunes. so talented, and his album also has a song with jason mraz and one with stevie wonder.

then, there was of course, the geek in the pink, mr.a-z himself. what a cutie. his voice in person is exactly like what it is on the albums. he's really talented and really a super geek, which i love. i even wore my "i love geeks" shirt especially for the show. takes one to love one, right? haha.

so, he mostly sang the songs from the newer album which i've only heard once before, but i enjoyed them anyway. i'm going to steal kelly's copy and upload it i think. for older stuff he did "you and i both," "after an afternoon," "unfold" and "curbside prophet" which made me happy, although i was hoping for some "tonight, not again." maybe next time. overall an awesome concert and i would definitely go see him on his next visit to boston.

well, so much for not having anything to talk about. whether it's interesting or not, the jury's still out on that one, but it's a day to look back on and remember that even though it's been raining for 4 days straight, "life is wonderful".

the happiest town on earth?

tonight i was writing a take-home quiz for my contemporary mass media class, debunking an argument of the anti-FOX news documentary "outfoxed." to create my argument that the documentary never talked about the other big media companies and how they present news, i was looking up information about newscorp (the big parent company of FOX and about 100 other media outlets) and the rest of the "big five" (for those who aren't communication students, the "big five" are the five largest media companies in the world and basically own and control everything we watch, read, hear and see - aol/time warner, GE-nbc universal, viacom-MTV anyone?, newscorp - FOX, and everyone's favorite, disney).

so, i find this great site that outlines all the ownership of these companies (p.s. it is a little outdated - i.e. ge/nbc recently merged with universal). at the bottom of disney's entry it says "celebration, florida, a 4,900-acre town." i'm thinking, another resort area set up like a town or a place where disney world "cast members" live. but, of course i have to know for sure so, like everything else, i google it. what do i find? this.

it's a real town! but it's not like it's real. it's like stepford real. it's like pleasantville real. you can buy a house there or an aparment or a condo. it's all on the site. plus there's a hospital and public schools with subjects like horticulture and a community intranet that keeps you updated on town events. Oh, and my favorite part is in the town press release area - "snow returns to celebration". and just in case you can't link there for some reason i'll copy my favorite part right here:

"The day after Thanksgiving is known as one of the busiest shopping days of the year. But in Celebration, the day marks another tradition – the beginning of Celebration’s Nightly Snowfall down MARKET STREET. The snow begins Friday, November 28 at 6, 7, 8, and 9 p.m. for ten minutes and repeats every night until New Year’s Eve."

WHAT?!?! are you kidding me!? the town even has fake snow! i don't know whether to call the FBI to look into this place or start saving up for one of its $1,000,000 houses.

but really, i don't know about a major corporation owning my town. just think about that. think of your home town and now imagine mcdonalds owns it or warner brothers or, hey, disney. there has to be some sort of a catch. does the hamburglar show up for dinner unexpectedly? do they use your main street as a giant movie set whenever they feel like it? is your swimming pool not suitable for laps with all the rounded edges that make up the mouse ears?

maybe i'm just old fashioned, but i think i like my towns synergy/product integration/media congolmerate free, at least for the time-being.

Sunday, October 09, 2005


i ran out of things to do to avoid my theory paper. so i thought, 'hey, why not make a blog!' and here i am.

first i guess i should explain the name of the blog. it obviously comes from the quote by albert camus that i wrote in the description, but as for what meaning it has in my life i will explain.

like a lot of people, i have found that winter is a hard time for me. winters in boston are incredibly cold, windy and the worst part, gray. as my idol lewis black aptly put it: "you wake up and it's the grayest day you've ever seen. and then next day it's even grayer!" i love lew.

but anyway, the gray days and the long nights = the blahs for me and i become a useless, listless, sad case, eating cookies and wallowing in coldplay, counting crows and radiohead. and while a day here and there of depressing music and introspection is not a bad thing, a few months is not so good. don't get me wrong, i'm not saying that i get super depressed to the point where i close myself off from the world and don't want to live, i just get in a rut and i don't like it.

so as winter dragged to a close last year and spring finally seemed on its way, i realized what i had been doing to myself all winter. and now that i know what can happen i am determined to enter this winter fighting the blahs and reminding myself that i am responsible for the way i feel. no weather, no person, no music should be able to control my life so easily because overall things are good, i am lucky and to top it off, i now have the memory of 3 months L.A. sunshine to get me through.

so this will be a place where i can complain and share the shit if i want to and then be able to let it go. it will also be a place i can write and remember the good things in my life - the everyday random shit that makes my day, things my friends do for me and the great experiences i have. the things that always bring warmth and light into my life.

let it snow. let it snow. let it snow.